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Tell your kids the truth about tragedy

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Sandy Hook Elementary students were brutally assaulted and murdered in cold blood Friday December 14, 2012 at 9:30am eastern time.  The unthinkable act was carried out by Adam Lanza.  Adam is survived by his brother Ryan and Father Peter Lanza.   Shooter was mistakenly identified as Ryan who is an accountant in New York City.  Adam’s father, Peter, a GE Tax Lawyer, divorced his wife, Nancy, also a victim, three years ago.  Reportedly Adam had an altercation with the schools Administration staff on December 13, 2012.  It is unknown what the discord was about.

Reported neighbors of the Lanza’s said Adam was fine as a child but as a young adult Adam became more and more disconnected.  Adam’s auntie , Marsha Lanza of Crystal Lake, Illinois is assumed to be the sister of Peter.  Marsha is married to Nancy’s brother who was working out of town at the time of the incident and no doubt heard of the murder of his sister and is understandably distraught.
Marsha, Adam’s Auntie  said that his Mom Nancy was a great mother and no one suspected this behavior from Adam.

Yesterday President Obama said “We have endured too many of these tragedies and I react not as a President but as anyone else would, as a parent.”  President Obama continued to say that the families of Connecticut that are grieving need us as Americans to be at our best.  Connecticut families need to know that we are praying for them and we are here for them and every measure will be extended to the police of Connecticut to determine what lead up to this tragedy.  President Obama ended his speech by saying “May God Bless the victims and in the words of Scripture, 3 He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds. “ (Psalms 147:3)

Families of Newton, Ct gathered at St. Rose Church and United Methodist Church to pray for the victims, their families, the shooter’s family for strength, peace of heart, mind and deliverance.  Long time resident Chris MacDonald told Huff Post Buck Wolf,  “When you look at the TV and you see what’s going on, it’s hard to grasp that this is your own town where this is happening.”

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Chicago Public schools officials said because of this tragedy they are focusing more on safety protocol for the protection of the staff and children reassuring the parents of the schools as a safe haven.  The safety of the Chicago Public Schools is handled by the Office of Safety and Security.  This office is budgeted in to the yearly school budget page 47 of the 2012-2013 budget.  The following are the initiatives of the Office of Safety and Security:

  • Install or upgrade security video systems at schools with high incidence of violence
  • Implement non-violent conflict resolution training for security personnel
  • Deliver a “Child Lures” curriculum material to elementary schools to educate principals, staff, students and parents about the many dangers facing children at home, at school, on the street and on the Internet
  • Open additional security positions at schools in need, and re-deploy security positions to maximize the benefit to schools

It is interesting to note that the discussion of Gun Control was the topic of discussion among politicians from Washing to Chicago on December 14, 2012.  It is also interesting to note that the altercation from December 13, 2012 was not fully resolved and it is unknown as to whether or not the police were called to the scene to investigate the altercation between Adam Lanza and Sandy Hook Elementary Administrative staff. 

The Chicago Public Schools Office of Safety and Security has a set of goals in which they aspire to achieve.  I say ‘achieve’ because a spokesperson for the Chicago Public Schools admitted yesterday that the safety protocols are not always achieved and could use improvement.  One goal in particular is “Ensure the investigation of major incidents involving CPS students, staff, and/or property” .  If this had been achieved maybe all 28 people who were murdered senselessly would be alive today anticipating the Christmas vacation from school.

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Counselors suggest parents talk with their children and tell the children the truth because kids often create a situation in their minds that makes since to them when they do not have the full truth.  Also, it is good to allow yourself to grieve.  Accept the emotion so that you do not develop self destructive behaviors like binge eating, over indulging in food as a comfort buffer to pain.  The goal is to not put the emotion in a box for later retrieval.  Deal with the emotion as it comes so that you can get closure which will allow your mind to cope and not relive the tragedy over and over again.  The goal is to restore a positive sense of security among school children, teachers, staff and parents.

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